What is wrong with this world?  Why do these tragedies have to continue?  Why do we have to put up with it?  And, Jesus, WHY do these people have to remain on the face of the earth?

Life on the earth, I feel, would be far easier if all the evil were gone.  Nothing remaining.  Just happy go lucky people, serving and praising God.  There would be no senseless killings, no kidnapping, no hurting.  We would no longer be scared.  We could sit back, relax, and enjoy the life we have here on this earth until we are called up to heaven.  And everyone would be called up there if there was no evil driving people to turn from God.

After the tragedy in Connecticut at Sandy Hook Elementary I was devastated.  That day I had just been in my son’s Kindergarten class as I volunteer there every Friday.  I also volunteer every Friday for what’s known as Caring Kids Club, where two kids from each class are picked each week to participate because they have been caught being “caring kids.”  These are Kindergartners and first graders.  I heard the news and my mind immediately went to the school I was at not all that long ago.  Devastating.

And then it was time for their funerals.  Heart wrenching, but what made it worse was the fact that Westboro Baptist Church was protesting their funerals.  These were people who had done nothing worth protesting.  They were attending school, they were teaching, they were trying their best to protect the lives of the little ones.  Why would these people come all the way to Connecticut to protest?  There was even talk about them coming to my home turf to protest funerals of firemen who were taken down by a sniper during a house fire that said sniper had purposely caused to draw them out.  I call this group a hate group.  There is no love.  They are working for the wrong side, and I don’t think they even realize it.  They have been blinded.  They have forgotten what they’re protesting.

It was because of the protest of the funerals in Connecticut that made me cry out to God and ask “Why?”  WHY are there people like this in the world?  Why do people have to hate?  Why do people have to kill?  Why can’t they just go away?  God has the power over life and death.  Why can’t He just get rid of them all?

And then I opened up my Bible.  That night’s reading was Matthew 13, and in that reading was the Parable of the Weeds, verses 24-30.  God spelled out the answer right then and there.  This parable is about a man sowing good seed in his field, “but while everyone was sleeping, his enemy came and sowed weeds among the wheat” (v.25).  So, in this field, that was originally planned for good crops, both good and bad grew.  Good and evil.

vv.27-28: “The owner’s servants came to him and said, ‘Sir, didn’t you sow good seed in your field?  Where then did the weeds come from?”

“’And enemy did this,’ he replied.

“The servants asked him, ‘Do you want us to go and pull them up?’”

See?  Even they wanted to get rid of what was bad.  Why can’t we just pull them up?  It doesn’t make sense to let them stay here.  Or does it?

V.29:  “’No,’ he answered, ‘because while you are pulling the weeds, you may root up the wheat with them.’”

Oh.  So, let me get this right.  If we purge this world of all the “bad people” some of the good may be caught up in it?  Hmm…so because of this whole Salvation thing, there’s still a chance for those who are doing wrong to turn before their time comes?  It’s true that Satan has his workers.  There’s no two ways about that.  “You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father’s desire.  He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding the truth, for there is no truth in him.  When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies” (John 8:44).

But he also tries to get others to go along with his plans, those who have been called by God but have yet to answer.  “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick.  I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners” (Mark 2:17).  And weren’t we all there at one point?  We were all sinners until we asked for forgiveness and asked Jesus into our hearts.  And for those who have not done this yet, God has made time for it to happen.  People would completely miss their opportunity to change if the world was “cleansed” prematurely.  Okay.  So, basically, God is telling us that we need to recognize that, yes, there is evil in this world (we should never turn a blind eye to it), and that we need to continue to do as we have been taught.  We need to pray for the lost, and we need to witness.    

If we stayed in our homes, locked away with our families in a hidden closet, frightened of what is out there, praying that God just takes away the evil so we could come back out, we would be ignoring our part in this life.

The finale?

v.30: “’Let both grow together until the harvest.  At that time I will tell the harvesters: First collect the weeds and tie them in bundles to be burned; then gather the wheat and bring it into my barn.’”

God is our judge.  As promised He will separate the good from the evil when the time finally comes to do so, and because He is perfect He will not make mistakes.  At that time, those who have accepted His son, thereby accepting Him, will go on to life everlasting.  Those who do the work of the devil until the last day will descend to be with him.

But for now, we need to do the Lord’s work.  He loves it each time a lost sheep is found, every time a prodigal son returns.

Dear heavenly Father, help us not to get caught up with the evils of the world.  Help us to remember that we were once lost, and by Your grace we have been found.  Help us to be a reflection of you.

    I love the song by Garth Brooks called “Unanswered Prayers.”  It makes you think about your life and wonder what it would have been like if God DID answer that prayer.  “Lord, please let me marry someone rich and famous, or even just a wealthy doctor or lawyer.  You know how expensive my taste is.”  Or, “Lord, this is how I would like my life to play out.  Please make it happen.”  But He gives you something else instead.  The chorus of the song goes like this:

Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers
Remember when you're talkin' to the man upstairs
That just because he doesn't answer doesn't mean he don't care
Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers

    I do thank Him for the unanswered prayer for a marriage partner.  Yes, my father always told me to marry rich because of my expensive taste, but God introduced me to a chemist who, though the title sounds like it would be great, doesn’t see nearly as much salary as I had hoped for.  But I’m in love with him, and he’s a huge reason I’ve become so close to God.  He’s truly helped me in my faith walk, and he's my best friend.  We have three beautiful children together, a house in what I call “suburbia in the country,” aka. a housing development in a rural town with a cornfield at the end of the street, good schools, a great church, and the list goes on.  Thank you, Lord, for that unanswered prayer.

Oh, but this isn’t about unanswered prayers.  Nope.  This post is about an answered prayer that, well, I really didn’t want answered.  Or maybe I did, but I think He answered too quickly for me.  Yeah, maybe that’s it.  Anyway, let me start from the beginning, or at least a beginning.

    In January 2009 I decided that I was just too fat.  The scale read the numbers I never fathomed I would be reading on a scale.  I had three kids, no exercise regimen, and poor eating habits.  I was over 200 pounds.  214 to be exact.  Not cool.  In an online forum-based mom’s group I was a member of at that time a new forum called “Biggest Loser” was created.  It was based on the popular TV show of the same name, and anyone in the group who wanted to take part in this private forum could do so.  We shared recipes, gave each other exercise and eating tips, and really motivated each other.  Through that group I was introduced to an exercise program I could do on my Wii, and I fell in love with a healthy living website called SparkPeople (www.sparkpeople.com).  By April I had lost 40 pounds.  I dropped from a size 20/22 pants to a size 14, and my next goal was a size 12.  I loved the way I was starting to look in the mirror.  I could smile at my reflection.  I was happy, and my mood and my energy were far better than they had been.

    Then May hit.  On May 3rd my father died suddenly of a massive heart attack on the 4th green at his favorite 9 hole golf course.  Following his death I became addicted to coffee.  No, not just coffee.  Specialty coffee.  Oh so yummy sugar and fat filled coffees found a McDonalds and Starbucks (I hadn’t yet started my love for Tim Hortons).  I would make any excuse to stop.  I was so bad that when I would drive home from my mom’s or the mall (two towns over) I would pull into the McDonalds parking lot that just so happened to be on my way, pull up to the drive-thru, and order a medium mocha.  Sometimes a large, never a small.  If my kids were in the car I’d feel bad, so I would ask if they wanted chicken nuggets.  Way to go mom!  Yes!  Yeah…..

    So my fattening coffee addiction was under way.  Then, in September my five-year-old son was diagnosed with cancer.  We lived in the hospital for the first month, eating oh so healthy hospital food.  Oh, and in the lobby?  My now favorite coffee of all time:  Finger Lakes Coffee Roasters.  I had such wonderful friends through my mommy group, and they bestowed upon me little gift certificates and a punch card for the coffee stand in the lobby.  Or the one near the green elevators.  Didn’t matter, they were both the same.  And of course his treatments took three months to fully finish, plus every other month for a while after we had to go back for CTs and blood work.  I looked forward to those visits.  Mmmm….  Yes, bad mom.

    Needless to say, my healthy eating habits deteriorated.  I still made healthy meals at times, but too often we were eating pizza, Chinese take-out, eating out at different restaurants (I don’t need to tell you what that did to our finances), and stopping through the drive-thrus.  Oh how I watched for Starbucks drive-thrus on our way to different vacation spots.  I would have to come up with an excuse, typically, “I’m tired because of traveling and really need a pick-me-up.”  My husband knew better, and more than once he just kept on driving.  Good boy.

    So where is this long winded story going?  It’s going to get even longer.

    I’ve tried, and failed, to get back into the eating right and exercising routine.  I have put my 14s on hold for a while and have been praying that I don’t go above 16.  I’m holding steady, but those 16s have started to get a little tight.  Not good.  It doesn’t help that I would sit on the couch all day (not every day, but once or twice a week when I decided to have a lazy day) and watch about 5 episodes of a K-drama.  K-dramas are dramas from Korea, spoken in Korean with English subtitles.  Hey, I was getting some reading done!  Did I forget to mention that each episode was about 1 hour and 15 minutes long?  I’m not proud of that, I admit it.  So my whole day was wasted on the lives of made up characters in a country halfway around the world, wishing I had a life like they did.  All this while eating a tub of hummus with pretzel chips or pita chips (it’s healthy, right?).

    Yeah, I probably knew I was gaining weight, but I didn’t care.  Until I did.  In my church the new year always starts off with a 21 day fast.  My husband and I tried the Daniel Fast one year, decided it was too costly to do in the winter time, and gave up.  That was two years ago.  Last year I was bound and determined to do some fast, but I don’t even think I made it two days.  This year I made a more realistic goal for myself, and I’ve been doing well.  I allow myself only one cup of coffee a day, and not the specialty kind.  One cup (in the morning) from my Keurig, and I can only put skim milk and sugar (or Splenda) in it.  No International Delight creamers.  I’m learning to drink tea now, and I don’t allow myself to put anything in it.  I don’t snack in between meals unless I really need something because time between lunch and dinner is extended for some reason, but only a healthy snack (a truly healthy one) is allowed.  I don’t play games on my phone, and I don’t watch anime or K-dramas.  And you know what?  I feel amazing!  I’m reading my Bible still, making healthier decisions for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and I’m reading “Made to Crave” by Lysa Terkeurst (http://madetocrave.org/).  LOVE that book.  If you’re looking for a way to make your body healthier while at the same time drawing closer to God, this book is the one to go to.

    So what does this have to do with answered prayers?  Well, since I started reading Lysa’s book I’ve been more motivated.  I wanted to start slow, and that’s what I did.  I started just with eating better.  Exercise would come shortly.  I started officially exercising (oh, who am I kidding, I started exercising) this past Friday, but I knew it was coming.  Lysa had written in her book about finding a friend to be accountable to, and even to exercise with.  Well, I don’t really have anyone like that, so that wasn’t an easy chapter for me to read.  But, I took it to God, and I asked that He put someone in my life whom I could do this with.  More to the point, I had, back in 2010, taken a running class with a friend through a fitness store, and the “graduation” was a 5k.  My first and only.  I had actually enjoyed getting up early on Saturdays to run with the group.  Unfortunately, it was just too much to keep driving the distance I had to to do this, and my friend lives just as far.  I just wanted something close by, someone to run, or even walk, with.

    Small groups!  Our church has two semesters each year of small groups, and this past Fall they tried something new.  Instead of going to your normal “Life group” as they had been called, you now got to see what each group was offering that semester by way of content, and you could decide what you wanted to do.  In Fall it was fairly easy.  It was a tossup between the book of Ruth or C.S. Lewis’ book The Screw Tape Letters.  My husband and I opted for Ruth, and it was great.  This semester, however, I wasn’t so thrilled about the picks.  It wasn’t a matter of, “which one should I choose,” but a matter of, “I hate them all.  I don’t want to do any of them.  Couldn’t someone have picked something good?”

    Wow.  If anyone is reading this who actually is a leader of one of those groups, please don’t take offense.  It’s not you.  It’s me.  I knew that there were quite a few there that I would have loved to have done, but because I was being led in a direction I didn’t want to go, nothing looked appealing.  One of those groups was called Run for God (through www.runforgod.com).  The group will meet on Tuesday nights, and there’s an optional Saturday morning run/walk.  Nope.  Not gonna do it.  My husband is doing the men’s group on Tuesday night, and we wanted to do our groups on different nights so the kids didn’t have to go out.  Yeah, so what if the leaders house is right across the street from the street my kids’ friends live on?  Nope.  Not doing it.  I’m not getting up early on a Saturday.  I LIKE sleeping in on Saturdays.  Nope.  Not gonna do it.  I was so mad and practically in tears as I was talking to my husband about how terrible the picks were this time around for groups.  I told him that maybe this was God’s way of telling me to take a semester off.  But then I could see myself sitting in church, my pastor praising the small groups and asking who was already in one.  I could see my husband’s hand go up, but not my own, and I knew I’d be missing out on something.  OK.  So then, what do I pick?  I decided I would look through the paper again with the descriptions of all groups and try to find one “open mindedly” that I could see myself going to.  I looked at the paper, read through it twice, and then put it back down.  Maybe I’ll pray about it tonight.

    And that’s what I did.  I asked God to show me what group I was supposed to be in.  I didn’t expect Him to answer right away, but He did anyway.  I’m a very visual person, and He showed me a picture of the cute stick figure logo on the Run for God website (which I had checked out previously).  So, that was my answer.  I said, “Alright, I get it.  I’ll join that group.”  And I’ve been at peace since.  This Sunday I signed up at the Run for God table.  Well, to be honest, my husband signed me up because I wasn’t sure if I was going to make it to church because of my son, but that’s another story.   He signed me up for the Tuesday night meetings before church, and at the end of church I signed myself up for the Saturday morning walk/run.  Now I’m waiting for the student book that I ordered online, and am actually looking forward to the start of the semester.
  
  I could end this by saying, “be careful what you pray for,” but I know that’s not what I need to say.  Just a little friendly reminder that God hears us, and He has a plan for us.  We learned at church recently that we have a journey we’re on.  It’s not a ‘to-do’ list, nor is it a check list.  I took that to heart this Sunday when the associate pastor was talking to us about this, and I know that he’s right.  I knew already that I had been on a journey, one that is bringing me closer to God.  He has been putting things in my path, and it’s up to me to pick them up and add them to my pack as I walk.  He gave me the fast, then the book Made to Crave, and then the Run for God group.  He answered my prayer of having someone (heck, this is a group of someones) to run or walk with on Saturday mornings.  Go figure.  Praise Him for all prayers answered and unanswered, and don’t resist Him when He does answer that one prayer that you maybe could have held off on a little bit longer.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” 
                                                                                -Jeremiah 29:11

    Dear Heavenly Father, I praise You and thank You for all that You have done, for all the prayers that You have answered for me, and for those left unanswered.  Only You know the path I need to take, for You have set it in front of me.  Keep my foot from slipping.  And may all that I do be for the glory of Your great name, and not for me.